I’m Pretty Sure Jesus Doesn’t Want To Run You Over

Oh sure, I could be wrong about that Jesus fellow, but I’m pretty sure he’s just like that guy at our local Barnes & Noble. Wears tie-dye, drives a VW van and sells books for a living. Not so much into the running people over or even being like Superman and stopping people from being run over…clearly

I need to break some news to the Weaver family on The Amazing Race. When your father/husband is killed by being hit by a race car, then your mother is run over by a buggy on a reality show…it’s time to stop talking to Jesus.

The poor Black family. They seemed so nice. I wanted to steal the little boys. The sisters SCREAM TOO MUCH, but I like ‘em. I also like the siblings – the three brothers and a sister. They bring the funny. The Paolo family – I wish they’d been eliminated. Any family who treats each other like that, shouldn’t be on my tv. The family with the little girl and little boy – they do well, but those kids creep me out. I expect to hear, “Go towards the light, Carol Anne.”

Slowly, but surely, we’re getting caught up on our TiVo stuff. Fortunately, we only seem to have permanently added two new shows to our circle of tv friends. How I Met Your Mother and Twins, with Sarah Gilbert, Melanie Griffith’s lips and Cousin Larry from Perfect Strangers. Yeah, you might first have a prejudice against Twins, which I completely understand. But, it’s silly funny. The laugh track has got to go. If I can’t tell when to laugh, your show isn’t funny. Canned laughter is one of the most annoying inventions ever. Still, the show, amusing.

We still have the Geena Davis as prez show to watch, so our magic number might be three. We’ve eliminated Bones (Kathy Reichs books are better), My Name is Earl (okay, but not enough to add it to our busy tv schedule), and probably some other stuff I can’t remember. Oh wait, we recorded two episodes of Reunion, but neither of us could be bothered to watch it and make a decision. So, the decision was [delete].

Most importantly, other than Veronica Mars, hockey is back on Wednesday! The Leafs. Darcy Tucker, Tie Domi, Pat Quinn’s hair, Ron McLean, Don Cherry’s ugly suits, Jeremy Roenick, and from Lord of the Rings, Martin St. Louis. Yay! Just yay! Say, is that dumb CBC strike over yet? I want my Hockey Night in Canada on Saturday.